I *heart* Bombay (and well..Boston)

I'm urban..in the way other people are mountain-people or tunafish junkies. I love city life...something about dreary concrete blocks and grumpy people totally gets my juices flowing. Ergo, this will be a blog about me, my two favourite cities (Bombay and Boston), my addiction to Vietnamese coffee and my views on Gregorian chant and it's efficacy in curing some types of tympannic membrane rupture. Enjoy!

Thursday, February 23, 2006

Addicted !

I've been addicted to a lot of things in my "short life" so far (Any more age jokes and I'll be killing one of y'all sometime soon!).. Vietnamese coffee (Diesel Cafe, I miss you!), alu parathas (I fear I might still be addicted), boys (Well, now that I haven't had one in a while, I fear I'm cured!), Jane Austen (Hooray! Pride and Prejudice this Sunday at Fame Adlabs!), Roman history (am devouring Colleen McCullough currently) and finally TV.

There are more to add onto that addiction list but I fear that since TV came into my life in 1988 (Yep. We were the old fashioned "No TV, only books" family), I've been addicted. From Krishi Darshan and Chhayageet when we only had one state channel - Doordarshan to The Bold and the Beautiful and Crystal Maze when Star TV reared it's beautiful blond firang head to Indian Idol and The Amazing Race today; I've seen, heard and remember them all.

To the point where I can sing the "Sooraj ek, chanda ek" song, do the "Tree of Unity" dance, talk like a Fraggle and tell you about the Cruz Castillo - Eden Capwell romance at one sitting. I can tell you why "Sa Re Ga Ma" was good once upon a time and I can tell you to the nearest hundred how many times Anu Kapoor cried on TV during some crap-ass deshbhakti song on Antakshari (The answer is 400). I can explain the family relationships in Khandaan and I can tell you just when Veerawali went wrong in Buniyaad. Don't even get my started on the Friends, Frasiers, Seinfelds and Will and Graces of this world..

But my all time favourites are the reality shows. I used to be addicted to Survivor (when I still lived in Boston) and got my folks addicted to The Amazing Race as well when I got back (Now Amma will not make dinner/visit plans on Wednesday night! Sweet! I've trained her well). But my all time current fav show has got to be "America's Next Top Model". Tyra Banks and a whole posse of gay fashionistas (honestly, those guys are so gay, they make me feel like Butchy McButch!) bitch, moan and criticize a bunch of low self esteem having, sob story carrying, weird disease having, gangly women with giant boobs. How much fun! I've gotten my folks into it (though I suspect Annu just watches it in case Tyra Banks has a boob pop out or something!).

It's on Sundays on Zee Cafe sometime in the afternoon..just as I'm into my post-lunch funk. Last weekend I conned Vij into watching it too...and from what I heard, she loved it. Though that could have just been the giant joint we both smoked talking. Watch Tyra bitch - inhale - eat some alu sabzi - inhale - watch more Tyra - eat more sabzi - inhale - feel guilty for eating sabzi in front of models - inhale - criticize ads during commercial break - eat chips - inhale - Laugh at Jay Manuel - ooh and aah at the make up - inhale - talk about boys - watch more Tyra - mop up alu ki sabzi with chips - laugh - inhale - cheer when token bulimic makes appearance - inhale - laugh - Boo Tyra - flip through Cosmo and do quiz - Boo Tyra again - inhale - pass out just as they're announcing who is voted off.

That is why I love my life. I can combine all my addictions into one thing. I got my Sunday joint, I got my TV, I got my alu sabzi, I got my friend, I got bitching, I got to talk about boys, I got to drool at the Cosmo models..and at the end of the day, I'm sober enough to take an auto back to Bandra. Where I spotted Kunal Kapoor getting into a car and did the "mptch mptch" sound that sidey Bhaiyya-types make when they want to show appreciation. I think he might have spotted me..in which case, that's one more stroke through the list of boys I'd totally do. Heading the list? Still Johnny Depp.

Current Music:
(Feast of) Passover - Lee Perry

To go with the whole joint theme, some fantastic ol' skool reggae with the incredibly high pitched Lee Perry. Still remember listening to it the first time at Ilya's house as he gave me a lap dance while trying hard not to wake up his old land lady. Yes. My life has been "that" weird.

22 Comments:

  • At 10:57 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Hey Vikster!

    So, I came across your blog a couple of weeks ago. I googled "you know you live in bombay if" and one of your posts came up! So I started to read some of your posts and was immediately interested. I've already read a good amount of your posts (oh god, i'm already sounding stalkerish) and know a decent amount about you. I am from bombay, south bombay to be precise (I can totally see you rolling your eyes right now) and now studying in Atlanta. I enjoy your sense of humour and think (at least I would like to) that I am a lot like you. We have similar taste in men, (why is it soooo hard to find smart men!?!), and I love that you listen to all sorts of music tooo!
    Anyways, today I read your October 24th post, Ahmedabad blues and found out you studied engineering! WOW! That was a complete shock to me! Why? Cause I'm studying Electrical engineering! And only recently (like a couple of months ago) I decided I don't want to be an engineer in life!

    Anyways, keep up with the blog! It definitely entertains me!

     
  • At 12:28 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Don't worry, Anon.

    Vikster *hearts* his stalkers.

    Meenu

     
  • At 5:46 AM, Blogger roswitha said…

    I think Jane Austen is one of the unlikeliest phenomena to which human beings can be addicted, but also one of the best. It's amazing that there are as many Austenites in the world as there are, especially in the age of overdrive.

    However, am not so enthusiastic about Keira Knightley. I think Johnny Depp should have played Elizabeth. And Darcy. And Lady deBourgh. That would be hot. And also kind of creepy.

     
  • At 8:31 AM, Blogger Vijayeta said…

    Ah yes! America's Top Model. What a deliciously bitchy and shallow show. The perfect complement to my addiction to Project Runway with Heidi Klum. And the Fabulous Life on VH1 :D

     
  • At 9:34 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Dear Vikster,

    Mr. Anonymous is not wrong about how amazing you are. He is just stupid to think that I am going to let him have you!! You are mine!! Only mine... i am coming to get you my love.

    Happy anticipating,
    BK

     
  • At 12:45 PM, Blogger kuriakonz said…

    LOL @ Annu Kapoor crying and a poor whats her name..(she was the star of some mrigayini/mrinalini/something like that serial loong loong time ago) trying to catch up with his tears..

    oh and dya remember, he ALWAYS cried when they sing 'bharat humko jaan se pyara he'

     
  • At 12:57 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Both you ANNOYING ANONYMOUS DUDES best keep yo' skanky hands of my MAN cause he done already asked me to marry him twice, so unless you two hoochies want my foot dead in your desi ass you'll better quit playin' an stay away from my amigo negro, vicky.


    UMMM!
    DUNCAN

     
  • At 2:16 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Hahaaha, it's funny you guys think I'm a guy! Cause I'm not! Vikster is all yours! (Duncan and BK can fight over Vikster).

    "Annoying Anonymous Dude" #1

     
  • At 2:44 PM, Blogger Ameet said…

    Catfights are fun. Even in blog-comment-land.

    :-)

     
  • At 9:49 PM, Blogger Vikster said…

    Anonymous #1: Cheers babe (I hope that greeting is sufficiently androgynous)!

    Yeah, I'm am/was enginner who saw the errors of his ways (and realized I have no chance of ever picking up a gay with "I design microprocessors for a living").

    Stalk away!

    Meenu: Yes. Thank you for that carte blanche on my behalf. G-d knows I haven't been stalked in a while..

    Ros: Johnny Depp rules all before him. I went to bed last night watching Sleepy Hollow. Johnny Depp, Tim Burton and gothic horror - I almost creamed my pants (well OK..so I did)

    Vij: We watching P&P and Memoirs of a Geisha Sunday no?

    BK: Please tell me you're a guy? The last few people telling me that have been straight women or lesbians. (What a very smuggler-type name you have...BK!)

    Kuriakonz: How true! I couldn't stand the sanctimonious mofo and his faku patriotism.

    Duncan: I'm negro no more. 5 applications of Fair and Handsome every night and I'm now looking like a bleached Heidi Klum.

    Anony "Dude" #1: This could be Govinda's new movie title...

    Ameet: We'll have our own cat fight over your hot PR friend when you get to Bombay..

     
  • At 9:03 AM, Blogger Unknown said…

    I get this very nasty feeling that BK is a 30 something NRI from Kiwiland.

    In which case I think he could be categorised as a porn star rather than a smuggler

    @BK (If it is who I think it is) Hey dude! Welcome back!

    Your (I'm sure by now) MUCH elder Sibling.

     
  • At 10:56 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    ahh, diesel cafe and miss austen -- now those are addictions worth suffering with. :-)

    anu

     
  • At 4:33 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    The real addiction for any student should be that of the right career because that is where a majority of your waking hours are going to go. Take a look at - Make your passion your profession

     
  • At 4:59 AM, Blogger sudeep said…

    You missed the British sitcoms! Or was that just bait to attract poor lil boyz like me?!

    At least we share another common addiction - alu paranthas. Connotations change, of course :)

     
  • At 12:13 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Vik,

    Don't know why it should be that difficult to hook an gay engineer! Don't really now but I think i am seeing a huge SPURT,of blokes who come out state side!

    So, take heart, your chances of hooking an engineer get better each passing day!

    Man,I think no one remembered, Cruz Castillo! I was surprised when u missed the Carringtons form Dallas

     
  • At 12:26 AM, Blogger Vikster said…

    F-cubed: 30 something Kiwi? Who looks like a porn star? Sign me up!

    Anu: You know what you have to do...you're heading down to Diesel for a Vietnamese coffee on my behalf OK?

    Hiren: I haven't been a student in close to 7 years now...so no more studying for me...

    Sudeep: British sitcoms aren't an addiction..they're my life!

    Anonymous: Hey Bhagwaan! What made you think I wanted an engineer? (Unless he makes a lot of money and buys me nice things)

    I HATED Dynasty! Though I love Joan Collins!

     
  • At 1:38 AM, Blogger Vijayeta said…

    And you've been tageed :)
    Check my blog for what? Why? and How?
    ;)

     
  • At 1:17 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Nigga PLeaze!

    what's wrong with being dark and lovely today! It's the original and the best, and its free.

    DUNCAN

     
  • At 12:04 AM, Blogger Karthik said…

    Most nice blog.

    You have a reader.

    K

     
  • At 4:12 AM, Blogger Fanaah said…

    Hahha you just took me down memory lane! Sigh-Nostalia.

     
  • At 2:34 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Great VICK, i'm email you and get in touch with you when i get to BOMBAY! and trust me, you'll just want to be friends, I'm Kathy Bates and you're james caan in that Deloris Clayburn movie, not so much boob though....HAHHA
    You have to promise to be my FRIEND or else---
    I'm bring you some history books
    DUNCAN

     
  • At 7:32 AM, Blogger Ludwig said…

    Hi

    Most readable blog. Stumbled upon it via some quizzing links. A couple of (fairly improbable) coincidences have registered so far:

    * We share birthdates. With Shakira. Kid you not. And no, am not a stalker :)
    * Self lived for about four and a half years (till May 2004, anyway) in and round Davis Square (Cameron Ave., Clarendon Ave. ring bells?) Was a frequenter of Diesel, MacIntyre & Moore, Johnny D's and so on. Your photo looks vaguely familiar.
    * Self happily ensconced in Hyderabad, but missing Beantown pretty badly ever so often.
    * Seems like the desi quizzing circle is bleddy tiny. JK is an acquaintance. Who knows who else...

    You're bookmarked :)

     

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