I *heart* Bombay (and well..Boston)

I'm urban..in the way other people are mountain-people or tunafish junkies. I love city life...something about dreary concrete blocks and grumpy people totally gets my juices flowing. Ergo, this will be a blog about me, my two favourite cities (Bombay and Boston), my addiction to Vietnamese coffee and my views on Gregorian chant and it's efficacy in curing some types of tympannic membrane rupture. Enjoy!

Thursday, February 16, 2006

Stand up for your right....to PARRRTTTYYYY!

Midweek partying is such fun. I feel so evil going out for a drink..OK many drinks..OK many MANY drinks on a Thursday night when like all good Hindu boys I should be praying before Hanuman - The monkey God. Well, you won't catch me on my knees in front of someone sworn to celibacy - God or no God. I didn't do it for Father V. (my school principal) and I ain't doing it for no one!

Anyway, Thursday night found me at Zenzi in Bandra. Managed to get out of dinner with the folks soon and headed over toute suite to watch Vidur Kapoor - a gay Indian stand up comic performing there. Walked in around 8.45 pm to meet a couple of friends I knew were coming...and got started on the beers. Zenzi has good Sour Apple Martinis but they're a bit expensive for a middle-class Bandra boy like yours truly...so I stick to the (again, vastly over-priced) beers while I'm there. Anyhoo, there I am, being all flirty and floozy (That friends, would be my regular Thursday night persona..I'm Miranda all week and Samantha on Thursdays). And then...

Louis XV said it best when he declaimed "Apres moi, le deluge". I walked in and made myself comfy, and then watched the parade of the creme de la creme of Bombay gay society. Hot man after hot man, interesting woman after interesting woman. I'm stunned silent (OK. I'm totally lying here..I can never be silent..let's say I was stunned "less garrulous"). Where were all these fine specimens when I was hanging out at the bar at the GB parties? Where did all the lesbians come from? Why are there no straight people at Zenzi? Why am I drinking beer instead of my usual martini? Questions followed questions. (OK so there was a fine sprinkling of people I detest, but that's just the perils of being a first-class bitch)

Watched Vidur do his act. I loved it. Perhaps I related a lot to being a gay immigrant in America...and the humour therein. Though I recognized a couple of the lines...very Priscilla, Queen of the Desert. I do so love that movie and the bitchiness in it...."I may be gay, but I'm not blind". I so totally want to say that to someone when he asks me out. Though with my luck, I'll end up saying it to myself (seeing as I'm doing a lot more "with myself" nowadays..wink wink). The audience loved it as well...how could it not? A predominantly gay group about evenly divided between the fags and the dykes (The dykes all sat on the floor while the fags queened it up on the few chairs..Sigh! Will our desi women never learn to demand more?)....the jokes played right into the audience. I stood right in front of 2 hot dusky women with fabu bods. Later discovered they were Diandra Soares and Sheetal Mallar. (This sentence for the token straight man I know reads this .. gay men - you have been warned). The two of them were hot. No other word for it. Abso-fucking-lutely hot. For a brief 2 seconds I wondered what watching them make out would be like. And then I spotted a hottie and spent the next 2 hours staring at him. There is now no hope of me ever changing teams methinks...Bye Bye Bi.

In short, had a great time. Drank a lot, flirted a lot, met people, finally met a fellow blogger (Read his take here..I guess he hated me when we finally did meet). I do take getting used to .. especially when I've been hitting the beers. I can't wait for more stand up stuff in Bombay though. I'm dreaming of the day we host Margaret Cho, Eddie Izzard and Ellen! Till then, I suppose we'll have to make do with Shekhar Suman and the ironically named "Great Indian Laughter Challenge"....

Current Music:
99 Luftballons - Nena

T. (The straight German model who shares his tokes with me) and me plan on singing this in German at Not Just Jazz next Sunday..knock the socks off the Sheetals and Karans in South Bombay!

11 Comments:

  • At 3:30 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Vik, i think i last saw you in Zenzi, holding court! But I loved every expensive minute that I was there, its worth it!

    It'll be sad if we let the cops send us packing...why can't they just let Bombay be!

    Gummy!

     
  • At 4:50 AM, Blogger roswitha said…

    I don't know if its a good thing or a bad thing that I don't drink. On the one hand, I wouldn't be spendingany money at Zenzi. On the other hand, I would be at Zenzi and not drinking. CONFLICT.

    Vidur Kapoor sounds really interesting, anyhow. I love bitchy people.

     
  • At 9:45 AM, Blogger Hob Gadling said…

    And the token straight man thanks you. I shall spend most of my evening tonight wondering what it would be like to watch those two make out.

    (And why did you have to bring the Great Indian Laughter Challenge into this? When I was visiting in November, I had actually drawn out plans to brutally eviscerate Sidhu and Shekar Suman and then dance on their entrails while watching Borat.)

     
  • At 11:42 AM, Blogger Vijayeta said…

    You know, there are some posts of yours that i read and think how well you write... This is one of them. (Dont ask me why!)
    Karaoke with Mr. T sounds verrry interesting :D
    And yes, how come i was not told about Vidur Kapoor?
    :(

     
  • At 7:39 PM, Blogger F-cubed said…

    "... I guess he hated me..."

    Now I am beginning to wonder if my fag-stag (the male equivalent of a fag hag) is right when he always tells me that I have absoluttely no social graces and excell in giving off negative vibes to everyone who come up to me.

    Viraf

    PS 'Bandra Boy' that he is, he bitched about the fact that I did not introduce a fellow Suburbia junkie to him at Zenzi the other night.

     
  • At 9:46 PM, Blogger Wild Reeds said…

    Amen to that - imagine having Ellen perform in Bombay. The feeling of community and warmth in the room that day was indeed awesome.

     
  • At 11:16 PM, Blogger Vikster said…

    Gummy: Holding court? You make me out to be some sort of snobby South Bombay socialite! Just say hi next time! I'm not that much of an ogre am I?

    Ros: On your next trip here, I'll buy you a martini at Zenzi. Khush? I'm bitchier than Vidur btw.

    Hob: I LOVE BORAT! Not to mention "my Julie" and "Is it cause I is Black?"

    Vij: I think you're one of the 5 people who have met Mr. T...he's so funny with his German accent!

    Fcubed: Nah, it's not the "no social graces" when we met..you were quite polite. It's the blog bitchery :-)

    Wild Redds: Now that I "finally" know who you are, hello! I love your blog!

     
  • At 9:53 PM, Anonymous lavi said…

    You're a funny guy, Vikster! Yes, mid-week parties are the funnest! Been readin' your blog for a while now..good stuff!

     
  • At 2:04 AM, Blogger pranav said…

    whee....another of those 'token' straights has the rest of his work day ruined at the thought of Diandra and Sheetal making out....*drooool*...!
    damn...how does one get to know of these happenings??

     
  • At 9:14 AM, Blogger ahem! said…

    Hey! I made it to ur blog, dunno why just did and i read a lot... am very sleepy now. But am not leaving till i add my 2 bits... i thnk u shud write about our nite out @ NJJBTB - Phil Nicoles - last thursday... now that's a stand up comedy.

    ps... u write really well ;)

     
  • At 12:03 PM, Blogger Aparna Kar said…

    Hey , I was googling for Vidur Kapoor's videos when I came across your blog..
    U r wicked!
    I loved this post

     

Post a Comment

<< Home