I *heart* Bombay (and well..Boston)

I'm urban..in the way other people are mountain-people or tunafish junkies. I love city life...something about dreary concrete blocks and grumpy people totally gets my juices flowing. Ergo, this will be a blog about me, my two favourite cities (Bombay and Boston), my addiction to Vietnamese coffee and my views on Gregorian chant and it's efficacy in curing some types of tympannic membrane rupture. Enjoy!

Monday, October 17, 2005

No! I mark easily!

Well, my skin that is. So when I walk into work on Monday morning with a giant blue-black welt on my neck, it naturally leads people to ask if something is wrong. Well, the virgins at work anyway asked if I hurt myself. The all-knowing souls on the other hand; I get a wink and a nod. The Vikster has had a good weekend.

Clubbing on Friday with S. and his very beautiful and interesting date S. took me to Shooters, this club in Bandra I'd never been to which is weird seeing as it would be the closest club to my place and McDonald's. Now how did I ever miss the place? I walk in with my Superman Tshirt and about 5 minutes later a very sheepish girl comes up to me and hands me a napkin (TOTALLY flirting with me) with a request to hand over my Tshirt to her and her friends. I played along gamely, hoping there would be a hot guy friend who would perhpas want my Tshirt too...But alas, just a bunch of women. Anyway, they buy me a drink, ask me to dance, touch me rather suggestively when the DJ played CandyShop and then ask for my number. Boy! Women in Bombay are aggressive! Nice! If only they teach their lily-livered brothers to show the same amount of guts...

Ended up at a close friends birthday party on Saturday. Lots of fun and lots of bitching. Well, it was a room full of gay men after all. I spent some time linking everyone in my head (Well, he's slept with him, and he's slept with him and I've slept with him and he's sleeping with them both but they don't know it, and he's slept with us all and....) The hot guy who hadn't slept with any of us was instantly judged by us all...and numbers were exchanged. Pity he seemed uninterested in me. He did laugh at my jokes though....(which means he was probably very drunk ..or just being polite). Ah well, Happy birthday GuppieTalk!

And then Sunday Blessed Sunday! Waking up late with a mild hangover, heading off to Coffee Day to read my book in peace (Jerusalem, One City, Three Faiths - Karen Armstrong), before I know it I'm 3 Cappachilos down and 140 pages into the book (about when Titus tears down the Temple). No cute men around. Apparently 12 noon is way too early for the hotties of Bandra to show up anywhere. I gamely soldier on through the book...I'm starting to worry I'd give up a good date for a good book nowadays. At least my book won't cheat on me. LOL! *looks down at shoes*

Anyway, get a phone call from girl from Friday's club night. She wants to meet up to say Hi. OK, I say, I'm not doing anything, Come on down and we'll walk along the Carter Road Promenade. She shows up and we wlak along in the HOT sunshine and make desultory conversation. I quickly find out she's 22 and thinks like a 15 year old. Sigh. Even the women who want me aren't mature enough to know what they want. I shudder and force myself to listen to the details of her vacation to Dubai. I hear "shopping" and my ears perk up. I hear "Hot Arab men" and suddenly I'm all ears. Then she grabs me (We're sitting on the promenade now) and proceeds to chew the gristle off my (ol' crone-like, withered) neck. "Ow!" I protest, "Stop! I mark easily!" (I seemed to have forgotten the phrase "bruise like a Georgia Peach") She continues and then moves on to a more pleasurable kissing session (I mean, on my lips).

Well, it's been a while since a guy kissed me. I miss that. I may be gay..but I'm still a man. I'll take what I can get.

Lips locked for 15 minutes, I beg off saying I have somewhere I need to be. I walk her back to her car and come out to her along the way. "Oh! OK" she says "It's just that you had awesome lips so I just had too...I'm so sorry". LOL! NO! I enjoyed it just as much as you did B.

And then spend the rest of the evening and night hiding a rapidly growing and colouring hickey. It was red when I went over to V.'s party, blue when I got home and about a deep grey this morning..People snigger, girls giggle, guys nudge each other. Yes. I mark easily.

But someone kissed me. Horray! Even if it was a woman....

Current music:
Humming "Shiny Happy People" by REM to self softly. (My headphones are missing!)

OK, so I'm also doing the funny dance that goes along with the song..


  • At 7:54 AM, Blogger anydamnguy said…

    that is something i have never done. kiss a girl.

  • At 7:54 AM, Blogger anydamnguy said…

    and i will never regret.

  • At 10:57 AM, Blogger karuna said…

    And aren't you lucky the shiv sena wasn't patrolling carter road. ;)

  • At 11:18 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…


    Bad fag! Bad fag!

    no matter who you kiss, i know you love me the most!

    Muah (yeah, seriously)Meenu

  • At 4:49 PM, Blogger I Male said…

    Egad! Eww! y**k! *all the bad ugly faces I can make*.. I was reading all the fun about bitchin and suddenly, somewhere in the middle of nowhere I read "I'll take what I can get." and I go.. EWWW (bold, 150px font size)!! How can you do this, Vikster? How? Yeh sunane se pehele tumhara munh kyun jal gaya? hey bh----n, ghor anarth!!

  • At 8:53 PM, Blogger Dunce Happy said…

    i totally get what the girl means. you just have awesome lips, guy. poor thing, she just didnt have a chance!

    besame mucho (kiss me hard) is singing in my head. smooth, real smooth.

    i wanna be kissed too!!! anyone?


  • At 9:02 PM, Blogger roswitha said…

    Hahaha. I hear the OED is planning to include carteroad (n; v: to carteroad) in their word list next year as a synonym for getting some when you most need it. Also known as being bandstanded.

    I've never carteroaded or bandstanded in all my years as a Bombayite, though. Hmm. Clearly I forfeit my claim to be identified as a true Khar/Bandra-ite.

    (As a friend who has carteroaded numerous times in the past might have congratulated you: full on, dude!)

  • At 10:04 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    hmmm! damn interesting... but pleasee pleaseeeee dont turn straight!!!...


  • At 10:13 PM, Blogger Vikster said…

    OK everyone..

    Calmez-vous already! I ain't turning straight! Though at the rate I'm going, I should probably consider it as an option. It beats sitting at home on a Saturday night waiting for a boy (any boy!) to call.

    Anydamnguy: Try it. A kiss is a kiss is a kiss. Just make sure your hands aren't wandering (like they would with a boy). I'd recommend cupping her head in your hands and kissing. (G-d, I should write a book on this.. I just love to kiss!)

    Karuna: Sunday afternoon on Carters? Shiv Sena is outta their league here..

    Meenu: We're BFF!

    IMale: When you come to to Bombay, we can rectify this transgression on my part Mmmkay?

    DunceHappy: Thanks *blushes*. (Though sadly I'm singing Samantha Fox's Touch Me Touch Me I wanna feel your body)

    Roswitha: Full on dude? You mean I. is your friend too? Only he says things like that!

    Ryan: Refer to beginning of this comment post.

  • At 11:13 PM, Blogger Medha.. said…

    Ooooh la la! Vik dahlink, looks like you had one hell of a weekend. *cheeky smile*

    Not been to shooters, but yeah clubbing scene in bombay is
    pretty good!

  • At 11:54 PM, Anonymous kestrel said…

    someone wrote it for vikstar...
    Koi bhi waqt ho hans kar guzar leta hon
    khizan ke daur mein ehd e bahar leta hon
    Gulon se rang, stiaron se roshni le kar
    jamal e yar ka naqsha utar leta hon...
    ....Mast nazron se allah bachaye by NFAK

  • At 1:13 AM, Blogger southpawpisces said…

    bandstanding.. like the sound of that, though i've never been bandstood myself..

  • At 9:23 PM, Anonymous Priyank said…

    This was much better than the literature (read mediocre porn) I generally love to read.

    - Priyank

  • At 12:14 AM, Blogger pranav said…

    eh damn..I need to make that trip to shooters, methinks...!!!!;-P

  • At 4:04 AM, Blogger Vikster said…

    Medha: Whereabouts are you? You could come out with me sometime and see for yourself!

    Kestrel: I had to give it to one of my collegaues to translate. Now he's wondering who's sending me such poetry...

    Southpaw: Being bandtanded is better than being MohammedAliRoaded..trust me.

    Priyank: Ooh..let's trade! My blog for your porn!

    Pranav: Or you need to borrow my clothes when you got clubbing...that works too.


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