Prayer works? And other musings...

So Durga Puja began yesterday (Sashti was yesterday) and like every year (well, assuming I'd have done it for all those years I spent in Boston), I headed over to the DP (Durga Pujo) over by my house in Bandra to watch the Bong dadas set stuff up before heading over to the Ramakrishna Mission in Santa Cruz for the aarti there. (And the bhog, but don't tell Ma that..oh wait! If She is indeed the Great Goddess, she'd know I'm there to check out guys and eat bhog...).

So this time, I head over (feeling very underdressed...it's HOT here in Bombay..35 C yesterday evening!). I wore a vest and shorts and got many looks from the assorted pishimas around. I could hear them mutter (in Bengali naturement!) "How come he gets to be in such deshabille while I have to lug my belly fat around in a tangail?" Left my chatai chappals at the "Leave shoes and other items here" desk and sorta hopskippedjumped (Rushdie literary device...anyone get it?) accross the burning tarmac to the cool of the hall where the idol of Ma was kept.

I sat down, looked around, found the poseurs in their kurtas (FabIndia, non-FabIndia, FabIndia, FabIndia, FabIndia) and then saw the idol. Wow! Ma's eyes are always the first thing that I look at..and OMG! Were they beautiful or what! I mean, it's this weird feeling where a cultural Hindu like myself (who believes myths are just that..myths, who doesn't believe in ritualized Hinduism, who treats religion scientifically but follows it becuase my ancestors didn't spend 1000 years running away from assorted Muslims and Catholics to be allowed to practise Hinduism in vain!), I, felt this amazing feeling where I felt like Ma would give me anything I asked for if I told her why I wanted it.

I asked for only one thing. That M. never forgets me.

I came back home that evening after a few hours, checked email...and there was a one-line message from M. After 3 months of silence. Not one word, not one email, no calls.....and the day I ask for something from Ma, I get it. He misses me. Still. I cried.

Coincidence? Sure, why not? But I'd like to think it had something to do with the feelings I still have and will always have for M. and the fact that someone somewhere (an energy, a woman with 10 arms, a presence, an idol) recognized that and made it happen. It gave me goosebumps. And yes, I went back to the RK Mission and gave thanks for the gift Ma gave me. I am happy today after a long time....not becuase M. emailed me. But because I now believe someone up there (and around me or wherever) cares about me. Men may come and go, but Ma will always be around for me. And that feels like the best feeling in the world.

Theism is not in fashion here in Bombay. My friends will laugh..and I understand why. I would laugh at myself too. But sometimes there's a lot to be said for faith and the way it makes you feel. I even feel kindly disposed to the Halwai downstairs and his non-stop Durga bhajans...and that's saying a lot for the well-disposedness I'm feeling!

Saptami today..and I'll be there at the evening aarti as usual. I think this time I'll ask for some new shoes. And that big bottle of Hugo Boss I've been dying to own. I mean, with Ma on my side, I can have M. and smell good too!

Current Music:
The Winner takes it all : Abba

(Does anyone notice how Agnetha's accent makes it seem like she's saying The "Weiner" takes it all? LOL! Story of my life!)