Kids today...I tell ya!

Vij and me have had long conversations about dating younger guys..as have Guppie and me. Conversations between Meenu and me (and assorted bystanders) on this topic can fill up a small book (tasteful, coffee-table sized..with flattering pictures of me discussing this over a coffee at Carters). Heck, besides Meenu , I have 3 other friends in relationships with younger men. OK, to qualify that statement..I have 3 other *female* friends in relationships with younger men (ranging in age from 2 years younger to an astonighing 7 years younger).

In the gay world, it's more of a fetish issue. Some men have fetishes for the older, greying, pot-bellied types while some have a fetish for the barely out of their teens, can't raise a stubble type. (Will receive lots of heat for next statement so read it, understand it and then bitch about it pliz!). Most of the gay men I've met don't want to date their age. The ones I know in their mid-to-late thirties onwards seem to hang out with them 19 year olds; and vice versa. Of course, people my age (late 20's) are too busy trying to pick a side (both age-wise and sexuality-wise) so we're fucked either way! Over the past few months, people I've met who're my age have either confessed to liking them much younger or much older. Not the same age....and I've always wondered why!

Personally, I'm very comfy around people my own age. I grew up in a different time in India. Sorta straddled the old socialist behemoth with the new consumer age. I know what it's like to have waited 8 years for a telephone connection and remember paying Rs. 5 per month as school fees. And I also remember *seeing* my first computer and drinking my first Coke in my late teens. My "gay life" had both periods of extreme guilt as examplified by the 80's and (err) gay abandon typified by the youth of today. It's hard to adjust to people who have no memories of growing up in the 1980's. It's equally hard for me to relate to people who were grown up when I was a little boy in chuddies. And by relate to, I mean in a relationship sense. Not as friends.

Meenu has held my hand as I wailed and bemoaned the lack of datable guys in their late 20's/early 30's. "They're too busy getting married and planning on cheating on their wives" she said. "They're too busy dating EVERYONE else but me!" I said. I believe the truth lies somewhere in the middle. I've been told to suck it up (hehehe) and go out with the 21 year old who finds me interesting. I've been told to pull up my socks (hahaha) and date the 43 year old who has the hots for me. I read this interesting (but incredibly badly written) article that talked about how the ancient Hindus believed that the ideal age-gap between partners is 3 years. Which means I should be open to dating 26-32 year olds. But where are they? The 26 year olds are shagging the 40+ crowd and the 32 year olds have taken to robbing cradles...

M. was 30, E. was 32 and I. was 25. And even though none of them was Indian, I still felt close enough in age to them to be comfy around them. The feeling is intensified in India. Here, there's more that I can/should have in common and it just doesn't happen anymore. "Age ain't nothing but a number" as a lot of people have told me. But it's hard! The huge age gaps work for most of the people I know. It just takes a good deal of work for it to work for me. I'll try...G-d knows I'll try! But it's going to exhaust me.

Current music:
Omaeni Horeta - Misora Hibari

My favourite Japanese singer (and one of my favourite Japanese songs). Her heyday was the mid 50's so I guess she's like a Japanese Patsy Cline...no wonder I like her!